My Space and Your Space

My Space, and your space – signal who we are. This fact has become front and center to me this year. I recently moved and am living in a house that is not mine. It’s a very, very nice house. Finer than anything I’ve ever lived in, with expensive furniture and art the norm. Additionally, all the usual appliances and accoutrements are of the top shelf variety. However, all of that does nothing for me – it’s not my style. It’s not what I like. In fact, all of that makes me lonely. Let’s get into that.

Who Are You

Who you are is reflected by the things you surround yourself with. I know, that’s counter to the traditional and current mindfulness philosophy. I’ve written before about this: here, and here, and here. Because, given the freedom to choose*, how you spend your time (and money) signals to the world, and yourself what is important to you. Your values. Moreover, nothing says what’s important to you more than Your Space.

I long for my stuff. My stuff is who I am. My furniture, My Art, the books I read. (There are few books here.) Everything that surrounds me here is a reminder that I did not choose this. I’ve lost my freedom, my independence–my most important value.

I do respect who you are, who my generous hosts are. Our differences. However, ironically, Abraham Lincoln understood that when our Declaration of Independence stated “All men are created equal” it did not mean “in all respects”. Others, before and since, didn’t get what Lincoln got. Nevertheless, he was willing to go to war, pit brother against brother in bloody combat, to defend the others’ crooked thinking. Lincoln believed he was right, and that right makes might and right would prevail. In that he is not unique.

Well … here we are, still fighting that war.

The Hatred of Donald Trump

I’ve written before about The Hatred of Donald Trump. However, without any effect whatsoever. Take Trump’s current renovation of the East Wing of the White House. Almost everyone agrees that it is needed. We need a place to entertain foreign important people. Tents! Really?

It has occurred to me that the reason people are so upset about Trump tearing down the old East Wing and building another one is about one’s personal space. Additionally, it’s not about wether or not it’s a good or bad idea. Or is long overdue. Rather it’s a reminder, an in-plain-sight reminder, of who he is and who they are not. That this man puts his stuff, everywhere. His values. Moreover, now he’s taken over their house (a misguided notion) and said to everyone for all time, I am somebody.

Furthermore, how successful he is and you’re nothing in comparison.

And that is so wrong! Because I am somebody, too. We are all created equal. Therefore, he must be evil. He is a liar and thief. He would even kill to dominate. He’s Hitler!

I am stunned but not surprised. Thus, I am so sad. Even Psych-girl can’t help. She’s passing me off to others because she’s “given me all she can.” She said she’s “proud” of me; and that I can “do this.” Meaning, I can adjust to giving up total command and control of my life.

I don’t know. It feels like death knocking.

My Space

My space is who I am. Like what you see? Doesn’t matter. It’s who I am – set free. My stuff reminds me of my life of seventy-five years. The good parts–the wins. Nowhere are there pictures or things that remind me of the  frustrations and failures. Of which there were many. More?

In Conclusion

My Space, and your space signal who we are. And that’s important. It’s our self-esteem, our identity. We can’t all be dominate.

Coming to terms with who we are is not comfortable. And so we build fictions about ourselves. To be reminded of what is real is not pleasant. Either.

Given the freedom to choose – what does your space look like? Could you give it up?

* The “freedom to choose” is another debate worth consideration. Are we? Really? But, set that aside for now. There was a great Civil War fought in this county 165 years ago about slavery. That’s what I’m talking about here–the freedom to Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness–the Declaration of Independence and it’s interpretation.